to eat as I've not had anything all morning.
It's very apt my view out the window today. Facing a wall. I'm just feeling in a very reflective mood all morning since I woke at 7am. On 4hrs sleep.
My life in general just feels like it's come to a limbo stage. It's neither here or there I guess which is a very unsettling feeling.
Looking back to this time last year so much really has changed. A year of separation playing a key part. Between friends, family and even as "deep" as a personal separation of beliefs/notions I once had. If it doesn't make me a harder person I don't know what will.
Two of my best friends both in work and on the "outside" no longer work here. One is going traveling and the other is in another job and in a serious enough relationship now so we don't/won't get a chance to meet up as much these days.
Over the year I've lost contact with 3 friends due to one reason or another. Two of old and one of new. No ones fault in particular. I guess for example people can just drift apart and have other things going on in their life. Same as anyone, myself included. Though I hope none of these are dead in the water. In time I hope to some how find a way to restart these friendships and breath new life into them. Should it be possible and wanted.
Family wise both my sisters are in LTR's with kids and their own home. Neither of them a whole lot older than myself. It's great to see but I always have at the back of my mind how much I want what they have. Minus kids but with a cat and a dog lol.
My best best mate is in a LTR also and is due to be getting married Oct 10. Also setting up home together and renovations planned to make it their own. Again it just makes me think how far everyone has come over the years while me, I'm here in limbo land.
Work, don't even get me started. Meh !
Have to go, not finished this post so will update later.
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