To boldly go (UPDATED)

and here we are. The 29th of June 2009. D-Day. I know I'm cheating somewhat as I was to stop blogging by the 29th, though I did say as of the 29th. My reason for the half a cheat is as follows....

I had started this post yesterday evening on my mobile but my battery went dead. Also it went dead at the worst time possible. Long story but in short :

I went to Harmonstown train station to catch the last dart home. A mate walked me to the station after spending the evening in his and getting introduced to his new kitten. It was to be my 3rd train journey that day from Harmonstown as I was out Saturday night (all this Pride lark...) and stayed over. Went home and back out again.

When we got to the station it was 5 mins to the train so we walked down to the platform. When we got down to the platform two total knack bags walked passed and barged into him and then turned and said to him something along the lines of "are you alright mate" in a really nasty tone, got right up in his face and asked us for money, or more so demanded it. We just said no, and turned away a bit so not to be making eye contact with them. They walked off anyway after exchanging one or two more words "watch your back" and the likes. These two "men" I'd say were mid 30's and out of their tree on whatever drugs they had ingested that evening. The tea towel on his head somewhat gave that impression away before they even opened their mouth.. Anyway all they wanted was trouble but with "people" like this while you would love to hit them a smack, you don't know what they could be carrying.

Anyway it turned out they had tried to rob a few people at the station minutes before and the police were called and already on their way. They actually caught them a minute or two away from the station. I guess there is some justice out there.

Anyway

*******************************************************************************

I've done this blog for well over a year now. About a year and a half if I'm correct and it's honestly something I've really enjoyed doing. There was never any reason to why I blogged, I just found it a really handy way of gathering and storing all the random stuff I'd come across online. Also it was great for personal stuff like pictures and general memories from holidays, night outs, concerts and the likes.

I spent a good few hours over the weekend actually going through my whole blog. Month by month, year by year. It's actually crazy it look back on as it really does bring back a lot of memories. Some that make me smile and others that just make me, well feel sad and wishful I could go back in time.

If you have a blog, look back since you started and you might be surprised how many memories there is. Though I guess that's dependent on what type blog you have.

I always used to think it would be cool to keep a diary, as gay as that may seem. I remember years and years and years ago I tried this for all of 3 months. Within that 3 months there was a lot of teenager lark put in it "went to a mates house, drank 1.5 cans I'm so crazy...." or "went to Game and got the new Zelda/Mario game". I stopped after 3 months when the only thing I put in it was just "nothing interesting, same as yesterday". I remember about a year later during a tidy round I found it and thinking how surreal but cool it was looking back at the stuff.

So this is the diary I never had I guess. One that I've kept for a year and a half... and counting.

I'm not stopping the blog forever I don't think, just merely taking a bit of a break. The reason I'm taking the break is that I've found of late my reasons to blog have become somewhat of an effort, putting out too much how I'm feeling at the time and worrying if posts will be taken up as having other meanings and so on.

I just have too much going on right now, I'm a bundle of emotions I guess but to move on, you have to let go of the past and try and put a plan of action before you, even if it does feel erratic. Everyone needs to move from bad or rough times, even though it may be hurtful. I have tried to do this over the past two months. It sure aint easy and every step of the way is filled with doubt, worry, regret while hopeful at the same time.

Over the next few months I have a few things I'm really going to try my best to do. Both for myself and for others. If you don't try you'll never know. Life is what you make it, and I know you have to just keep on trying.

So as I said in my last post, stay healthy & happy, enjoy life be it with friends, family or loved ones. Enjoy the summer, enjoy holidays and just enjoy life in general. That's what I'm really trying to do.

Take care

Brant

as of the 29/06

It has come to a point that I must say goodbye to the blog until I do something really important. Until that point, I can't blog anymore. So the next time I blog, I should be letting you know how I got on.

So until that time goodbye, stay healthy, stay safe, feel happy, have a great summer, enjoy time with friends, holidays and everything in between.

True

It's the simple things in life

Just on my way home. Went to see Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen. Was good, but like the last few blockbusters released recently they were just good. Some were good, some were very good but none amazing or ground breaking. In my opinion.

Met A "mate" after work in the St. Stephen's Green. He had spent the day getting a few things for work like new shoes and a bit of DVD shopping.

Anyway I met him on just across from the pond, with a few bags by his side. When I sat down he handed me a bag and said "got ya a present". At first I thought it was a joke until I opened the bag. What was inside..................................... socks. Fresh brand spanking new black socks. Call me old but I LOVE new socks.

Such a simple thing. It was thoughtful (the fact he took note of my love of socks) and it hit home that such a simple thing really warmed my heart. That all the material things in life I don't and probably won't possess, they don't really matter as much as I'd love to have them. As Tiz once said...well like two days ago... "you can't take them with you".

Anyway we went for something to eat, for a drink, to the cinema and a nice stroll back to the Dart. Him going one way and me the other... so in my case the DORT and in his case "da bleedin train".... I'm kidding Phil !!! It aint your fault your a Wrong Sider..... Hit me and I'll sue ;-)

Odd as it felt like a few days since I last saw him, when in fact I only saw him yesterday morning after staying over Saturday night.

By the way, if you see this and I know we both said it, what a great Saturday !!!

If there ever was a time not to turn around

This is one of these emails getting sent around. If its true, OMG !!!


"Family on holiday in Australia for a week and a half when husband, wife and their 15 year old son decided to go scuba diving. The husband is in the navy and has had some scuba experience. His son wanted a picture of his mum and dad in all their gear so he got the under water camera ready to go. When it came to taking the picture the dad realized that the son looked like he was panicking as he took it and gave the 'OK' hand sign to see if he was all right.

The son took the picture and swam to the su rface and back to the
boat as quick as he could so the mum and dad followed to see if he was OK. When they got back to him he was scrambling onto the boat and absolutely panicking. When the parents asked why he said 'there was a shark behind you.' The dad thought he was joking but the skipper of the boat said it was true but they wouldn't believe him. As soon as they got back to the hotel they loaded the picture onto the laptop and this is what they saw.

Try and tell me you wouldn't have emptied your Entire digestive system right at the point you saw it

Would you have stayed to take the picture?
Maybe what saved them was that the shark wasn't hungry, they were in the water not on the surface, and there was no fear coming from them – only because they were not aware. Probably better that the kid didn't point for them to look behind them"

Where there's a will, there's a way

Why do I always say something stupid when Im around or meet someones
parent(s).

Many of which are now famous with my mates and comes up from time to
time. For a laugh.

Anyway yesterday I was over in a... friends house and his mum was
there. Never met her before. Said a few words and all went well. She
went out for a bit and came back in around 10. We were watching a film
and she came and chatted for a few mins before she went to bed.

Anyway as she said good night to him she said "anyway I'm off to bed,
nice to meet you. Youse have a good night" to which I replied "will".
Not "I will" or "thanks, nice to meet you". Just "will" on it's own.
Like even if I said "I will" that's an odd thing to say in the first
place. Especially under the circumstances...

Anyway another one to add to the list.

If you read this, you may not have noticed at the time but I guess you
will now lol.

Thanks for the dinner and..... :-)

So!!!

So far I love :

- the cut and paste
- mms. Either send a picture saved or take a snap while you txt.
- able to forward a txt.

- search your iPhone
- shake to shuffle

I'll check the rest out when it's not 1.51am. Like the voice side of things....

Pulling my hair out

Just got this from O2 re the iPhone 3.0 update. After trying at 12am last
night expecting to be able to download it and posting my excitment. Trying up to 2am (wasn't sleeping anyway) pressing refresh every few
minutes but with no luck. Then at 7am this morning and still no luck. I have a feeling
this evening could be any time this evening, night or morning... Hmmm

Anyway no more 3.0 updates till I actually have it and have tried it out. See if it matches all the hype. I first blogged about this months ago now when it was first announced thanks to my handy apple home page updates us mac'ers get.

Till then.... the wait goes on....

3 is a magic number, yes it is, a magic number

that bitch aint a part of me, no that bitch aint a part of me

Went to see Chris Cornell in the Olympia Theatre yesterday (15/06/09) Very impressed also. While some of his new stuff is questionable his classics really stand out and really put on a great show. Man he can sing. Was really pleased he played two songs off my favourite album of his, the first solo album he released Euphoria Morning.

I'll add one or two pics and maybe a short video I took during the concert later. Right now I'm tired as a goat.

WOW

Went to see the Shawshank Redemption in the Gaiety Theatre. Really really impressed is all I have to say. 10 outta 10.

It finishes on June 20th after only a short enough stint so I hope it comes back again as it's well worth a second look.

kinda crazy....

from time to time when I log on and see there is people from all over the world on my blog at the same time as me. A little pulse sign if you will flashes and names the place/country that's visiting. Well cool and thanks again for checking my blog out and for the feedback I've got.

Updated on post, a few posts back

How freaking amazing is this at night !!!

The recently completed 59 foot tall Gundam Robot in Japan. A group called the Green Tokyo Gundam Project built the statue in celebration of the 30th anniversary of the franchise and in promotion of Tokyo's bid for the 2016 Olympics

Technologic

By designer Kyle Bean.

Russian doll style cardboard model representing how mobile technology has miniaturised rapidly since the 1980's.

That time of the year

Coming home when it's either starting to get bright or is bright.
Birds chirping. Very strange I've always thought. A new day starting
when my day and night hasn't ended.

Had a nice night... If even we did get thrown out. So red faced.

I love stop motion

Sorry I'm Late from Tomas Mankovsky on Vimeo.

and the update

finishing from where I last left off :

Work, in brief really is not great at the moment. The same for most people I'm sure. Things have got a lot harder and there is a lot more expected from you as a member of staff for less money than you were on a few months back...

Also I just feel like a little fish in a big sea. With the company I work for, one of the biggest in the country I'm merely just a number. No amount of work one does, no amount of loyalty shown or perfect attendance you really are just a number. Again, in the current climate this really is even more apparent as while going back a year or two ago promotion would have been an option, now there is no chance of that for the foreseeable future.

I went to see Bodies the Exhibition, in Dublin's Ambassador Theatre. Finally after plans and talks to go many months ago now. I'm not going to speak too much of it as it is one of them things that you really need to make your own mind up on it.

What I will mention, again in short was the section on embryos and fetuses. It was truly one of those moments that I'm sure will stick with me forever. The Cycle of Life right before your eyes, only not living. Seeing them from the size of a grain of rice up to fully formed just really shows how both special and yet fragile life is in general. Well all started the same way but all end up so different yet ultimately wanting the same things from life.

Life though is what you make it.

Sun shines on a red brick wall

Just on a quick break. Needed to grab a quick cup of tea and something
to eat as I've not had anything all morning.

It's very apt my view out the window today. Facing a wall. I'm just feeling in a very reflective mood all morning since I woke at 7am. On 4hrs sleep.

My life in general just feels like it's come to a limbo stage. It's neither here or there I guess which is a very unsettling feeling.

Looking back to this time last year so much really has changed. A year of separation playing a key part. Between friends, family and even as "deep" as a personal separation of beliefs/notions I once had. If it doesn't make me a harder person I don't know what will.

Two of my best friends both in work and on the "outside" no longer work here. One is going traveling and the other is in another job and in a serious enough relationship now so we don't/won't get a chance to meet up as much these days.

Over the year I've lost contact with 3 friends due to one reason or another. Two of old and one of new. No ones fault in particular. I guess for example people can just drift apart and have other things going on in their life. Same as anyone, myself included. Though I hope none of these are dead in the water. In time I hope to some how find a way to restart these friendships and breath new life into them. Should it be possible and wanted.

Family wise both my sisters are in LTR's with kids and their own home. Neither of them a whole lot older than myself. It's great to see but I always have at the back of my mind how much I want what they have. Minus kids but with a cat and a dog lol.

My best best mate is in a LTR also and is due to be getting married Oct 10. Also setting up home together and renovations planned to make it their own. Again it just makes me think how far everyone has come over the years while me, I'm here in limbo land.

Work, don't even get me started. Meh !

Have to go, not finished this post so will update later.

So going to Japan

Liking the Updates

SOUTH AMERICA ANSWERED ME !!! LOL

NOW ASIA AND AFRICA !!!!

THEN .....

ok this is freaking me out a little

AMAZING (Say in Dr Evil Voice)

2009 Gullwing-America 300 SL Panamericana

Looking forward to 3.0 and this when it hits these shores

"I guess it's time for you to hate ...."

Eminem, he's back with a new album. His first in a few years. Now while I know it's hard to see past the whole rap thing when 99% of it is just rubbish. No one can deny that he's obviously someone who is really good at English and can articulate himself very well if not only on pen to paper.

PSA

Well I've done somethings I've set out to and some things I haven't, blog related.

I hope y'all like the Globe checker. Find it really interesting some of the hits I've got. Fair few places in the States, Oz and Europe. South America, Africa and Asia are blanking me so far lol. Thanks also to Kim in Tulsa, Gene in M.D and George in Ohio for the feedback!!

I'm going to look down the route of updating the Globe Checker to a more detailed map. I do have to look on the map for some of the places to see exactly where they are (not the country smart arse !!!) like some of the States in the US for example.

Speaking of the US : Talks of going to the US in Oct is looking more and more likely. Will
see how things pan out and the exact destination(s).

Still not yet decided yet on what to do with the blog. Give it a break for a bit, start a new one and delete this or keep it going like I said. You'd swear I had a huge following with the way I'm going on lol. Just I feel somewhat on edge with my blog. For example :

I was asked by a friend the meaning of my most recent post. They got their wires crossed thinking it was about them over an issue that happened over the weekend.

The Trent Reznor Lyrics but the Johnny Cash version of Hurt got me thinking. Reflecting he knows he's got hurt and hurt others himself in the past and the fear I guess of the same thing happening again to himself, and the hurt he might inflict on others.

It was the lines "what have I become" and "I will let you down, I will make you hurt" is what seemed to stick.

The post was entirely about and directed towards myself. Like hurt you can go through and be so harsh on yourself. Then on the flip the worry of will I one day cause someone the same hurt. So I hope the lesson I've learned is something I don't forget. So I have it there as a reminder to myself, no excuses if it happens.

Just to clear that up.

Peace out

Cake

Hurt

"I hurt myself today
To see if I still feel
I focus on the pain
The only thing that's real
The needle tears a hole
The old familiar sting
Try to kill it all away
But I remember everything

What have I become
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know goes away
In the end
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

I wear this crown of thorns
Upon my liar's chair
Full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
Beneath the stains of time
The feelings disappear
You are someone else
I am still right here

What have I become
My sweetest friend
Everyone I know goes away
In the end
And you could have it all
My empire of dirt
I will let you down
I will make you hurt

If I could start again
A million miles away
I would keep myself
I would find a way"

*******************************************
when someone does something that hurts you
when it's happened to them before
you'd think they'd have learned a lesson,
there can't be anymore excuses on this, no more.
but in the end its life, so it's ok.

Well !!!

By no means bad. Would be a nice drink to have on a hot day... Like
it's apple brother lol

Luvvvvvv this video

KANYE WEST "PARANOID" feat: RIHANNA Dir: NABIL from nabil elderkin on Vimeo.

But it's not good enough, even though it's real...

Kicking of the first of about 6 concerts I've so far got tickets to is :


Manic Street Preachers
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Olympia Theatre

Second time seeing this band and yet again they really are second to none when it comes to putting on a live show. At first I was a little unsure at the start but only because they played a few songs off their new album I was familiar with.

When they belted out the classics they were truly awesome !!

If your going to... San Fr... Georgetown

I fell in love with Georgetown, Washington D.C. in March of this year. Only about 20mins (not even I'd say just traffic was bad) outside of the main sights in Washington D.C. (White House etc) is Georgetown. Without going into too much detail it just really reminded me of San Francisco, the general vibe and the buildings etc. A really nice area with heart.

Anyway while looking around the shops we headed into a "sneaker" store (keeping it American). Looking around at the huge selection I came across these which I loved. Though for some reason and the fact I had just paid for another pair of sneakers I didn't get them. I couldn't justify it. So I said there would be other sneakers and didn't buy them.

On to Orlando and on the hunt for more sneakers I looked, picked up two other pairs but at the back of my mind I was just couldn't stop thinking about the sneakers in Georgetown.

Roll on to June and back home in Ireland... I GOT THEM. ORDERED ONLINE IF NOT A LITTLE PRICEY FROM THE US BUT I GOT THEM.

YIPEEEEEEEEEEEE

SO HANDY

PSA

So it's some time since (yet again..) I made any real posts to this blog. I've come to realise that it's the blog itself that's causing the issue. It reminds me too much of a time that has now passed, as much as I wish it didn't. So I can do one of the below things.

1) Just keep at it
2) Stop blogging for a few months
3) Start a new blog from fresh and inform anyone that needs to know or is interested what the new name/address is.
4) Stop blogging full stop

Also I'm going to discover a new load of sites and blogs to look up and search for updates and so on. Again like my own blog it feels like I'm stuck in that period and I want to move on. It's hard to get across what I mean. Just I associate all of the old sites, blogs etc with that period of time. So as of now it's goodbye old sites/blogs - hello to new ones that I hope to find/stumble across. I need to do this, for myself..

It's something I'm going to think about over a few days, maybe do a load of posts & take the blog down and just sit on it for a bit. Who knows !!


In other news, Dusti my new kitten now 10 weeks old is doing good. A rescue kitten from the DSPCA. My mum was lonesome after our cat Luki of 16 years passed away not too long ago. At first I wasn't in agreement with getting a new kitten, but at the end of the day its an animal in need of a good home and love and who am I to say no. She's all ready fitting in to the household after the few weeks we have her. I'm picking up on her mannerisms and quirks also, yes even at such a young age.

Lastly and most recently amongst all the hurt from something, Ive started getting to know someone as a friend. It's all early days but so far so good. Way to soon to even think about anything else/serious but for now I'm enjoying meeting up. Something we've done a bunch of times which is new to me. I guess I'll see how it goes, only time will tell. A lesson I've so learned, the hard way and hurt isn't the word.

It's nice to have two new positives when the past few months have been heartbreaking. I have to try and keep busy.

Peace out

Cake

03/06/2008

It would have been a year today
but we didn't make it that far,
you were carefully planning your future without me
while I had planned one together to far.